WOW! It’s amazing how much a person can get done when they aren’t in Fibro-Flare. I have kept up with my 3 in 30 goals all week. It’s been really nice to have something to think about other than pain and fatigue. The pain and fatigue take over your mind and it’s so hard to pull yourself thru it. You just have to wait till it eases enough so you can use what little energy you can find to pull yourself up and get on with some semblance of normalcy. The key is to not put so much pressure on yourself so that guilt eventually plays a role. I’m so bad about saying I’m gonna do something, which ends up getting canceled, and then allowing the feelings of guilt to creep in and take over. Guilt only leads to negative self talk. Negative self talk leads to depression. Depression puts me back in bed and the ugly cycle begins all over again. So the goal is to control your thoughts at the beginning so that the downward spiral isn’t even in the picture.
For example, I have had the laundry on my 3 in 30 goals list for months now. The goal is simply to do ONE load a day. That seems to be something that I can manage even if I’m in a flare. And accomplishing that on bad days makes me feel like I have done something productive. Just doing that one thing helps me to hold the guilt at bay so that I’m nowhere even close to the spiral. I am a housewife and a stay at home mom. My job is my home and family. If I can accomplish one task required in my job description then I feel better about myself as a person. It’s easy to allow ourselves to just give up and lay in bed and beat ourselves up. That’s the easy part. The hard part is to get up and make ourselves do something – just one thing (in my case it is one load of laundry a day). I notice that I feel better about myself mentally. So that one load of laundry can change my whole day. I may go straight back to bed after putting it in the washing machine. But I go back to bed feeling better about myself.
The second goal is also healthy for me mentally. The second goal is to get out of the house and visit with a friend IN PERSON at least once a week. This week I visited with Suzy after she got off work one day. I’ve mentioned Suzy here numerous times. This week when we met it was so I could pick up these bracelets that she made for me through her Etsy shop, That’s 2 Darn Cute.
So by scheduling a visit with Suzy I had to get up and get myself ready and leave the house. It’s so easy with Fibro to stay locked up in the house all day. But I’ve discovered if I am able to get a shower and get dressed sometimes it energizes me to be able to go out. Now sometimes showering has the opposite effect and forces me back to bed. But if I’m able to get out of the house it does so much for my emotional state. Then visiting with a friend allows me to touch base with someone who means something to me. It takes my mind off of myself. Besides that it’s just fun to spend time with a friend. It’s easy for us with fibro to feel like we have no friends. A lot of times our friends are our saddest loss that comes along with our illness. Friends like Suzy help me to know I’m not alone. I also have other friends that love me as well. They help me to feel less alone. through the month of May you will meet them because of this 3 in 30 goal to meet with a friend once a week.
Lastly, I’m working on finding ways to transition my blog from a personal diary to more of a marketing tool along WITH the personal diary part. That is a learning process. Learning something new isn’t easy when your brain is all foggy. But I’m doing it. And it’s making me actually FEEL smarter. Not sure that’s something that someone without Fibro could understand. But if you click on this link you can see what it’s like to use my brain to learn something new. It ain’t easy, darlin’!
So overall week one of May’s 3 in 30 goals is going well. It’s not only changing things around the house for my family but it’s changing me. It’s changing how I handle my illness. It’s changing how much I allow my illness to control me. That is my favorite benefit of all. I wanna be in control again. I’m fighting for that. That is the 4th goal! And that one is going well too.