This post was sparked by something I saw Deion Sanders post on his Twitter account this morning. I happened to have been thinking about this subject for days now. So I took his tweet as a sign that I should share my thoughts. He said:
What you can walk away from says a lot more than what you can stand up to! The victory is in keeping your peace.
Since the early days of having a teenage daughter I have had to lecture again and again and again about how it is ok to walk away from a confrontation. In 8th grade I heard a lot of “if she hits me I’ll hit her back” or “if she hurts my friend then I’ll tell her how I feel”. I remember having one conversation with her about walking away from a confrontation instead of keeping it going by trying to have the last word. She looked at me like I had 15 heads and they had ALL lost their minds. That was the most bizarre thing she had ever heard.
Last week I got wind that some girls were making fun of Lauren’s hair after she had it colored dark brown. I told her that they were trying to get a rise out of her and that the best thing she could do to get at them is to ignore them. She did it and OH MY WORD….IT WORKED!!! Then the other day she and her boyfriend had some kind of disagreement and we talked about compromise and how a person doesn’t always have to have their way. I told her it’s a sign of maturity to work through an issue rationally rather than with guns blazing just so you can get the last word in.
The hardest lesson to learn is that not everyone is going to seek forgiveness for hurting you and that is ok. We can write it off as a lesson learned in maturity on OUR part. And sometimes we have to be the one to humble ourselves to go and seek forgiveness for something.
Then the other night I was watching one of those Real Housewives shows (don’t judge me) and one of the women, Brandi Glanville, said “why do I have to apologize to her? She hurt me first”. Good heavens! You are a grown woman and you are talking like my 16 year old did when she was 13. Why can’t you be the adult and act mature and let it go? Apologize for your part and if the other person doesn’t….SO WHAT! Hold your head up, put a smile on your face and walk away.
Let’s choose the high road people! You aren’t always gonna get your way – and that’s alright! Not everyone who owes you an apology is gonna give you one – but you can keep your heart clear by making sure you’ve done your part – and then move on! Can we all just grow up and act like the adults we are? Is that really too much to ask? Get over it and walk away! Get on with your life! Don’t dwell on the negativity so long that it turns to bitterness inside you. Noone wants to be around that – well, noone that’s over 13 anyway!