This entry is gonna be one of those “whiny because I’m gonna miss my kids” entry. If that kind of stuff bores you then you might wanna skip along to the next blog.
I’ve been counting down the days left of school and the days till graduation. I have this really cool app that does countdowns. I’ve pretty much counted down to everything in the year 2012. If you wanna know how much longer till Labor Day or Flag Day just let me know. Anyway, I did this for them. However, all it is managing to do is depress ME!
I’m not sure what I’m gonna do with my days/weeks when they go to college in August. I won’t have a calendar full of soccer practices and soccer games or tennis practices and tennis matches. What am I gonna put on my calendars? I have been a stay at home mom/soccermom/tennismom/homeschool mom for 18 + years. How does a mom be a college mom? How do I go from day to day without knowing everything my kids are doing or knowing every place they are going?
I am looking forward to being able to travel more with Ron. But he doesn’t need me to parent him – although I do manage to do so occasionally. With my health as it is traveling won’t always be an option. Then I’ll just be sitting here staring at the walls talking to Faith and the cats – of course I do that a lot of the time now.
Who will need me? Who will text me that they forgot something at home and need it at school? What will I do each afternoon between 3:30 and 6:00 when I would have normally been at some game.
I know the idea is to raise children just for this stage of life. But I never realized how much of a hole this stage of their lives would leave in mine. When I sit and think of the rough days we had sometimes I remember wishing the days away. I remember thinking “if we could just get out of diapers” “if we could just get them to the stage that they can open the fridge and get their own cup out” “if we could just get to the day when they would stop whining”. How many days did I wish away by thinking those things? I regret every one of them. If I have any advice to stay at home moms and/or homeschooling moms it would be don’t wish ANY days away. They go fast enough already. Before you know it you wake up and it is 59 days until your kids graduate from high school. Soak up every moment, every tear, every hug, every tender minute – someday your wishes will come true except they will be preparing to jump out into the real world without you. It’s a great accomplishment for all of you. But it’s also very sad.